Category Archives: Relationship Building

Making Memories

30 Monday May 2016

Posted by in Life Lessons, Relationship Building

≈ 2 Comments

Tags

, ,

Like 50% of people in America today, I grew up with in a home with divorced parents. Mine happened to split up when I was six years old and because I was so young, I have very few memories that I can recall of my Dad from when my parents were still together. However, there is one that I remember vividly.

My sister and I had gone to bed and were fast asleep when my Dad came in to our room and woke us up. He told us that the original version of the Wizard of Oz was on TV and we needed to see it. I remember how exciting it was for us to get out of bed and go in to my parents’ room, jump in to their bed and watch the Wizard of Oz for the very first time… and as a family. That was one of my favorite memories with both of my parents.

Now to today… I have been a foster Mom to a boy and a girl (siblings, who are now nine and 11 years old) since October 31, 2014. In just a few short weeks they will be moving in to their “forever home” as they get adopted by a family that we have known for many years, and love. It is such an emotional time as we prepare our hearts to say goodbye to the first kids to ever call us Mom and Dad.

Tonight, the boys were out for the evening so it was just my foster daughter and I at home. Her teeth were brushed and she was in her pajamas and I was getting ready to tuck her in. For some reason I flashed back to many years ago when my Dad ‘broke the rules’ and in turn, created a memory that I will never forget. I looked at my foster daughter and said “You want to go swimming?” She looked at me (slightly confused) and said “Tonight?” and I nodded.

And so we traded our pajamas for bathing suits and went outside to the pool, cranked up some of her favorite top 40 tunes and swam, danced, sang and laughed in the pool for over two hours… in the rain. As the steam came off the pool, she swam over and gave me a big hug. It was one of the many times during our two hours in the pool that I had to hold back my tears.

Sometimes you just need to let the ‘rules’ go to create memories and beautiful moments that will last a lifetime. For me, tonight was one of those times.

Why Everyone Should Advocate for Someone

01 Sunday Feb 2015

Posted by in Leadership, Life Lessons, Relationship Building, Values

≈ Leave a comment

Tags

, ,

As a fairly new foster parent, it’s already become clear to me that one of our most important roles is to advocate for our foster kids. Whether it’s for special education programs, medical attention, specialized treatment or therapy or simply their best interests, things just move faster when they have an advocate fighting for them. I’m sure one day the kids will be able to advocate for themselves, but like most foster kids they are at a point in their lives when they aren’t in a position to do that.

Yesterday I was thinking about how everyone has points in their life when they could use an advocate. Maybe they are struggling with a tough situation at home, are overwhelmed at work or just can’t see what they need to do to get one rung higher on that corporate ladder. Sometimes, for any number of reasons, people just get stuck and could use someone to help them get ‘unstuck’… and that person could be you.

Think back to a point in your life when someone took a special interest in you. Perhaps it was a mentor, teacher, colleague, friend or family member. They invested in you with their time and experience to help you overcome the challenge you were up against and because of them, you are where you are today. Most people can think of someone in their life (or if you’re lucky, a few people) that went above and beyond to invest in them. Sometimes you aren’t sure why, sometimes it was someone unlikely and sometimes you didn’t even realize the significant impact that person was making until years later.

Regardless of who you are, your age, your experience, your job title or where you are at in your life, there is someone right now that needs you to advocate for them. To lift them up, to share your experiences, invest your time and just listen and care. You may be the only person that really takes a special interest in that individual. It doesn’t need to be someone that is going through a rough time. It could be someone that has plateaued in their career and can’t figure out how to get that next promotion and needs someone just like you to provide perspective and show them the way. To be their mentor, their coach and their guide on the path to their next big thing.

Today, take time to reflect on all the people in your life; people who are very close to you as well as those that are acquaintances. And then think about who may need you to invest in them and advocate for them. There is a big difference you can make in someone’s life starting immediately – it’s just up to you to take the first step and make the commitment. Be the person that years down the road someone looks back and says “Because of them, I am where I am today”.

The Art of Truly Listening

19 Tuesday Mar 2013

Posted by in Leadership, Relationship Building, Virgin Entrepreneur Blog Posts

≈ Leave a comment

Tags

, ,

It’s a crazy busy, multi-tasking, information overloaded, multiple-device kind of world out there. You likely have very little time to just ‘be’ – to step away from the hectic pace, turn off your incoming texts, emails, tweets and Facebook messages and just relax. However, it’s becoming increasingly apparent that there are side effects of this information rich, 24/7 world we’ve created, and one of those side effects is the decline of an individual’s ability to truly listen.

Read my full post on the Virgin.com Entrepreneur website.

Five Tips for Intentional Networking

07 Tuesday Aug 2012

Posted by in Goal & Priority Setting, Networking, Relationship Building

≈ 2 Comments

Tags

, ,

There are never-ending opportunities to network online through Facebook, LinkedIn, Twitter – and the list goes on. However, we all know some of the best networking comes when you meet someone face-to-face, shake hands and just talk! When you go to a conference or trade show, how much time do you put in to advance preparation for what I call ‘intentional networking’. This isn’t the same as randomly meeting people while you’re wandering the trade show floor (although that can have value too), it’s about creating a plan in advance, clearly defining your networking objectives and then working the plan.

Here are five ‘intentional networking’ tips for your next conference, trade show or networking event:

  • Master your pitch. I work a lot with accountants and many times when I meet an accountant, they will introduce themselves in the following way: “I’m Joe Brown, and I have an accounting firm”. Exciting, hey? Does that type of introduction make you want to do business with Joe? What if Joe introduced himself in the following way: “I’m Joe Brown and I help small businesses increase profitability and grow their revenue, while at the same time developing a long term strategic plan for success”. All of a sudden, you become interested. In fact, on the rare occasion when I’ve heard someone introduce themselves in this way, the response from the business owner they are introducing themselves to is “Wow – that sounds exactly like what I need”. Before you tackle your next networking event, make sure you have your elevator pitch mastered so when you introduce yourself, you clearly articulate how you’re different from your competitors, which will cause people to take notice and say “Now that’s someone I want to do business with!”.
  • Plan who you want to meet. Attendee lists are often available in advance of conferences or networking events – take time to study it and identify who you are going to be looking for when you arrive. Nowadays it’s easy to find people’s photos on LinkedIn so you recognize them when you see them, which also helps. Once you identify who you want to connect with, do your research. Take notes on their career history, read through their company website and become familiar with their      objectives. I’m always impressed when I meet someone and it is clear based on the comments they make that they have done their homework, so make sure you do yours.
  • Schedule in advance. Now that you’ve determined who you want to meet, you will likely see there are some senior level individuals or company executives on your list. Odds are these folks have a fairly packed schedule at most events they attend. Because of this, for the key individuals you want to connect with it’s recommended that you reach out in advance, let them know what you’d like to meet about and suggest two or three potential meeting dates and times, as well as a location. This will kick off the conversation and get you on their calendar which guarantees you’ll get some of their time at the conference. ‘Playing it by ear’ may cause you to miss a big opportunity to connect with someone who could change your business!
  • Maximize your time… and pace yourself! Leading up to the event, it’s ideal if you can plan well in advance so you’re not rushing around at the last minute finishing work projects or organizing things at home, which can leave you feeling burned out before the event even starts. Plan to pack early and leave some breathing room in your schedule for the days leading up to the event so when you arrive, you’re feeling refreshed and energized, ready to make the most of your time (and the investment you’ve made in attending!).  When you arrive, pace yourself. If your event is three or four days, don’t get caught burning the candle at both ends on day one and then find yourself feeling too tired to maximize the rest of the conference or event.
  • Break out of your comfort zone. When you attend conferences or events, especially when they only happen once a year, you likely have a list of colleagues or friends you haven’t seen in a while that you want to catch up with. Make you balance the “catching up” with breaking out of your comfort zone and meeting new people, which often leads to new insights and perspectives you can take back to your business. Also remember, there are many new attendees at every event regardless of size, so take a few moments to introduce yourself to someone you see standing alone. When I attend conferences I intentionally look for individuals who are standing alone and most of the time, those introductions and conversations turn out to be extremely valuable.

At your next conference or event, make a plan for intentional networking and you’ll be amazed at the doors that open and the value you’ll receive!

The Value of “Face Time” (and I Don’t Mean on Your iPhone)

26 Friday Aug 2011

Posted by in Relationship Building

≈ 1 Comment

We’re in an age where technology is thriving and in many cases, people have replaced face-to-face time with Facebook, Twitter, LinkedIn, Skype, conference calls, instant messenger and texting (and I’m sure I could add to this list). But as we wrapped up day three of meetings with our partner community in Vancouver, BC I am reminded again of how important face-to-face time is. Building and maintaining relationships “electronically” can only get you so far and at some point, there is tremendous value sitting down across the boardroom table (or the dinner table) with those that are important to you. These people may be your customers, partners, family or friends, but to take your relationship to the next level, I truly believe personal human interaction is critical. I remember when I heard someone say “In a world where things are becoming more high-tech, people need more high-touch”. I couldn’t agree more!

Here are five reasons I believe face-to-face time can’t be beat:

1. Less distraction. When you’re talking on the phone, IM’ing or texting, you can almost guarantee there are a million things going on around whoever you’re conversing with. When you get together in person, the focus on the conversation increases exponentially.

2. Body language. I don’t know about you, but I believe a very small percent of reading reactions and feelings is based on what someone says, and a majority of it is based on their body language. It’s hard to gauge the connection you’re making or whether or not what you’re saying is resonating if you can’t see who you’re talking to.

3. Bonding. At the risk of sounding “cheesy”, I always feel a deeper personal connection with someone I’ve met in person. I’m more likely to refer them or think of them when I have an idea or an opportunity.

4. People do business with people. You likely have a list of people you do business with because of them, not because of the company they work for. Think of a great real estate agent that you’ve worked with. If they changed real estate companies, would you follow the agent or stay with their former company? My guess is you’d follow the agent. Building relationships plays an important role in your long term sustainability and success, so don’t leave all your relationships to be built on technology. Get in front of the people that are VIPs in your life and connect!

5. New ideas. I wish I had stats on how many great, new, innovative ideas are uncovered during a phone meeting versus during a face-to-face meeting – I believe there would be a huge gap between the two. If you want to uncover “the next big thing”, make the time and effort to get some face-to-face meetings happening.

I want to say a special thanks to our Sage Simply Accounting Partner Advisory Committee that made the trip to Vancouver from cities all across Canada this week to spend time connecting face-to-face. Our meetings were successful because of the five points above and it was well worth the investment!